When looking back on the road taken to try and get CIRCLE OF DOORS out to the world, I just shake my head. Many experiences were positive, many disappointing, and the rest just kind of strange. To that end, here are a few stories from a once new author on that road.

My distributor started setting up book signings at Utah Barnes & Noble stores as soon as the books arrived at his warehouse early January 2008. My very first signing was at a store in The Gateway in Salt Lake City. I was nervous but excited. This was the beginning of everything.

The weather was cold as usual. My hands are cold most of the time anyway so I was alternating them in front of the heater vents as I drove our well-used Chrysler Town & Country south to Salt Lake. My handwriting is rough to start with, but cold hands pretty much means ‘I have no idea what that says.’

There seemed to be a lot more traffic than usual even for a Saturday. Parked a few blocks away in a neighborhood where me in my author dress and fancy new leather author bag walked across the busy plaza to the Barnes & Noble. I stood outside the doors for a moment to settle myself, walked in amongst the “normal” people, stood and looked around for a moment.

Apparently I looked out of place because before I could locate an employee to let them know I was there, a young female employee walked up and asked if I needed help. “I’m Ranse Parker,” I say. Her expressionless face didn’t change. “I’m here for the book signing?” Still nothing.

Eventually she says, “Oh,” looks around then walks toward the center of the story. I follow. There in the middle is a large open area with tall, 2 ft-square tables scattered around, each with books on display. The employee scoops the books off one of the tables and walks away. This time I wait, assuming this was where my rise to glory was going to begin.

I had noticed the books she unceremoniously hauled off were written by a well-known LDS Church president named Gordon B. Hinckley. Then it dawned on me that his funeral services were that day. That’s why there was so much traffic. And thanks to me, more or less, the minimal display of books honoring him were just dragged off out of sight somewhere. Great. Sorry.

The employee returns with a stack of my books, ten as I recall, drops them on the table and walks off again. It was starting to get a little weird. Then she returns with a fold up chair that was apparently from their break room because the fabric portions were covered in a variety of colorful stains. She sets the chair down next to the table and says, “There you go. Good luck,” and walks off.

I know I’m not James Patterson, but really? That’s the best they could do? Studied the stains to make sure they were thoroughly dry and non-transferable, and sat down.

Now picture walking into this store where over in the middle in an open area is a dressed-up guy sitting in a fold-up chair at a micro table with a stack of books on it. Would you have reason to go over and inquire as to why he was there? Neither did anyone else. Someone may have said “Hello” as they walked by, but that was it.

The store layout was such that when you walked in the front doors, you passed the checkouts then two, huge kind of conical-shaped round tables with books all over them. People would stop, peruse the books then continue on into the book isles nowhere near me. So after about a half hour of nothing, I decided to get proactive.

Took 6 of my books, casually walked over and put 3 of them around each of those big, round tables, went back and sat down. Surely at least one person would make the connection between those books and the few remaining on the tiny table in front of that handsomely-dressed guy way over there.

It was working. A few people where picking them up and looking them over. Now all they had to do was connect the dots. Then an employee who might have been the same one, spotted the books, picked them all up and hauled them off someplace I know not where.

There’s your sign. Collected my bag, walked out and drove home.

All was not lost, though. Experience always teaches lessons and that one taught me to call ahead to remind store management that you have a signing scheduled. However, I doubt that would have mattered this time given the clueless, could-care-less attitude of the employees at that particular store. Obviously I never went back.

The second signing experience a week or so later was polar opposite. As I approached the Barnes & Noble in Bountiful, Utah, the first thing I noticed was a big sign in the window that read “Ranse Parker Author of CIRCLE OF DOORS Book Signing Today.” Wow. That was nice, as were the staff at that store. Super friendly and actually happy to see me. A nice table setup, decent chair and a water.

They had advertised the signing at least a week in advance. Quite a few people had purchased and read the book prior to the signing, which was fantastic. Discussed the story and signed books for readers ranging in age from 13 to 92. Thank you Bountiful Barnes & Noble. You gave me hope.

Around this time, my distributor also got the book into Utah Costco warehouses and arranged for signings. Completely different experience than B&N. Whereas most of B&N’s products are books so they focus on authors (usually), the books offered at Costco are a fraction of their overall inventory so more than anything book signings there were a courtesy allowed by the individual warehouse managers.

The first Costco signing at the Salt Lake warehouse was another learning experience. It was possible an employee responsible for the books might get you a table and chair, but most of the time I was on my own to pull a small table out of their inventory along with a chair (a cushy office chair if one was on display), and bring my own tablecloth and whatever else. After that first signing I also had two, large pull-up advertising signs made. One was placed at the store entrance and one by the table.

Sometimes the warehouses were a circus and other times pretty slow. Busiest days were usually Monday, Friday and Saturday. Selling anywhere from 30 to 80 books during a 4 to 6-hour signing was typical.

Most managers would let me set up at the end of the book aisle. Good traffic. The exception was a manager at the Ogden, Utah location. He was a bit grumpy. The first time I set up there he made me move my table so it was next to men’s clothing. Not a productive day. The only other time I was there I was again stationed away from the book table. Enough of that. Plus their mercury vapor lights flickered and gave me a headache after a while.

Then there was the Cottonwood warehouse where a young man responsible for the books would go way beyond expectations and set up a big table with tablecloth and arrange the books in a fancy display. I was highly appreciative. He later emailed me a comment that the story in CIRCLE OF DOORS was “profoundly inspirational” to him. A welcome validation.

Had a similar experience at the Layton, Utah Barnes & Noble. Signed there a few times and the staff were fantastic. They had invited me to meet Richard Paul Evans who was doing a signing there one night. I had done one earlier elsewhere that day and was still dressed up when I got to the store.

When Richard arrived, he was greeted at the door by the 3 managers and me. The store manager introduced himself, the two others introduced themselves, then Richard turned to me. I suddenly thought, he doesn’t care who I am, so in a moment of facetiousness that probably happens more often than is appropriate, I said, “I’m security,” and shook his hand. He then went in and did his thing for the horde of mostly starry-eyed woman waiting in line.

A few in B&N management were genuinely impressed with the CIRCLE OF DOORS novel. The Layton store manager and I were standing watching Richard do his thing when the manager said, “Someday that will be you.” I cringed. The thought of schmoozing with a large group of “fans” wasn’t exactly comforting to a mostly introvert who believes the best neighbors are the ones who live at least a half mile away. That said, I sincerely appreciate those who supported and still support my efforts.

One of the stranger compliments I received was at another Costco. A few people were around my table when a young, female employee started yelling at me from down the aisle. “Do you see these bags under my eyes?” she shouted as she approached. We all stopped doing whatever we were doing and looked toward her. As she got closer to the table she again said loudly, “Do you see these bags under my eyes? This is because I stayed up all night reading your stupid book. Well, it isn’t stupid. You know what mean!”

Then there was a Lehi, Utah Costco signing where a woman I didn’t know stood at the end of my table for a good 10 minutes telling the line of people streaming by that they ‘really needed to read this book.’ That was a bit awkward, but free advertising is free advertising.

At that signing I remember feeling like a monkey in a zoo because it was very busy with a steady stream of people shuffling by checking me out. “Look honey, I think it’s one of those book people.”

Somewhere around this time I had a scheduled signing at the Barnes & Noble on the east side of Salt Lake City. Called the store ahead of time and was told by the store manager that she doesn’t have signings for “local” authors. Well then, I guess it’s a good thing 35-plus New York Times best-selling author, Richard Paul Evans, doesn’t live here, or James Dashner (Maze Runner series). Oh wait, they do.

Whatever. Then guess who calls me about 2 weeks later saying she’s had requests for signed books and wants to know if I could stop by and sign a few. You can probably guess what I really wanted to tell her. But if readers request signed books then they’ll get signed books. Certainly won’t diss them just because their local store manager is a pompous snob.

Speaking of books, Stephanie Meyer’s Twilight series was tough to deal with while trying to get my own book noticed. I certainly won’t fault her and her publisher for pretty much perfect timing and a ridiculously successful run, but it was like a plague I couldn’t escape. The books were in quantity everywhere with women young and old clambering all over them.

She had a meet-and-greet or something like that at a high school local to a Costco I happened to be signing at that day. To get into her event you had to bring a copy of her latest book, whatever it was. Good marketing strategy.

For some reason that Costco was a little slower than usual so when that happens I’ll roam around and look at the other books or whatever’s within a couple aisles of my table. Won’t lie, I sneered when I discovered the giant box on a pallet at the end of an aisle that had her book in it. There were maybe a dozen left of the hundreds that were obviously already sold. Shook my head and went back to my table to mope for maybe another hour before I’d call it a day.

Keep in mind, I had a giant banner at the front entrance and one at my table reading “Book Signing Today – Ranse Parker CIRCLE OF DOORS.” And, of course, my book was displayed and spread out on the table. You might guess what’s coming. A polite and somewhat clueless woman walks up to my table and says, “Excuse me. Can you tell me where the Stephanie Meyer book is?” Sigh…

Could have replied with something instructive, but I’m a nice guy for the most part, and professional. Smiled, stood up and said, “This way.” Walked her to the giant box where she thanked me, took a book and left. Meyer Shmeyer. Cleaned up and drove the hour home.

And speaking of slow warehouses, have you ever been in a Costco that was practically empty? Like maybe 5 people total? Here’s that story with a crazy twist.

It was a brand new store and for reasons I never knew, was a ghost town for most of the time I was there. The opening date hadn’t got out to the public or something. So I poked around in the books, read some magazines where I learned that Tom Selleck liked to dig holes and plant trees on his California ranch, then discovered a book that caught my interest.

It was the biography of a scientist named Henry Eyring written by his grandson. In the CIRCLE OF DOORS story, a new type of machine that can vibrate atoms apart is called the Henry Wave Accelerator, or HWA. It was simply a random, fun nod to this scientist who worked from around 1920 to 1960.

In the first few chapters of the biography it talked about a white paper Mr. Eyring wrote describing a condition where after smashing atoms in an accelerator, a portion of the original mass could no longer be accounted for. Since matter cannot be destroyed but only change condition, like water to steam, it was theorized that the missing mass was simply converted into particles too small to be detected. Kind of like Ant-Man going into the Quantum Realm.

I about fell out of the chair because what he described was exactly the same thing I had written in CIRCLE OF DOORS. In the story, Element Zero is theorized as these missing particles grouped together to form larger, completely new constructs. No, it couldn’t really exist in our world. The resulting mass would be astronomically dense and heavy. It’s one of those things where you do what you do to make certain parts of stories work or work better, like sound in space.

The point is, I totally made up a very specific, fictional scientific phenomenon for the story and unknowingly named it after a scientist who actually did write about observing that same, real phenomenon around 80 years ago. Explain that astronomically slim coincidence.

Another odd Costco experience occurred when a woman started sharing a concern that her husband and she would be blamed for the poor choices some of her over-18 children were making. Why she decided to confide in me I don’t know. Ended up giving her my chair and we talked for probably 20 minutes about life, children, and accountability.

I remember telling her that everyone has to make their own decisions and choices in life and live by the consequences of those choices. All we can do as parents is try to show our children the principles of life and ways of living we believe are best. What they decide to do with those examples and instruction is up to them. It may be hard to deal with the choices our children make sometimes, but it’s their life to live and their choices to make. Hopefully I helped, somehow.

Somewhere along here I was invited onto a local radio talk show and to appear on a local daytime TV news show. S.P Romney was the radio personality and a really nice guy. He said he hadn’t been interested in having a guest on his program for quite a while but loved the book and really worked it up on his show. Unfortunately his station had to run low power at night when I was there. At least a couple of people heard the interview though because they mentioned it when they came to the next signing.

The TV bit was pretty funny, and not in a good way. I’ll be the first one to tell you that I belong behind the microphone or camera, not in front of it. Never had a doubt otherwise. I’m basically a roadie. My job is to make people who actually belong out front look and sound good.

After receiving a DVD copy of the segment from the producer, it only validated my fears. There was a little gremlin off screen somewhere yanking on an invisible string attached to my right eyelid. Every few seconds it would twitch like I had some kind of disorder. Brilliant. Some people really do have a face for radio. And about 10 seconds before we were to go on-air, one of the crew ran onto the set and pulled my big marketing poster out of the shot. Thanks for that.

Had a bit of an anxiety attack one time after a signing at a Costco. Seems the fun stuff always happened at Costco. This was waaay back when you still had to renew your membership at the Membership desk. I was standing in line with 4 or 5 people in front of me. The guy directly in front of me was looking around casually, glanced at me and away. Then he spins around and says, “You’re the guy who wrote that book. Hey everybody! This is the guy who wrote that book!”

Talk about being sideswiped. It’s one thing to be the focus of attention when you’re “on stage.” You’re prepared for it. But to become the sudden focus of attention in public, more or less, kind of freaked me out. As I recall, I just froze and smiled awkwardly. Most people went back to whatever they were doing. The moment reinforced my desire to be no publicly recognizable celebrity of any kind.

People used to always say, “Remember me when you’re rich and famous” to which I’d always reply, “I could care less about being famous.” It is my goal for CIRCLE OF DOORS to become a worldwide success and no one have a clue who I am personally.

While there are many other stories, I’ll finish up with this one you may have already read about.

There were a couple of publishing companies in Utah I submitted my work to. They were the same ones that published some of James Dashner’s works. As previously noted, he’s best known for the Maze Runner series that made it to film. These publishing companies were a couple of the several hundred along with agents that rejected CIRCLE OF DOORS.

While signing at a Costco in Utah County, a young woman approached the table and told me she was an employee at one of the aforementioned publishers. I believe she said she was an editor but I can’t recall for sure. Because I was basically an unknown “local” author, she questioned if my work was any different than the other “stale” material she had to read all the time. Her description, not mine.

I knew exactly the type of books she was referring to. I told her in all honesty that my work was likely quite different. She was skeptical, but said she’d give it a try.

It was about two weeks later at a different Costco also in Utah County where this same woman came to that signing. She approached the table smiling and started talking about the story, concepts and connections and on and on about points I now don’t remember. What I do remember is she was getting more and more worked up until finally blurting out loudly, “I just think you’re a friggen genius!”

Unfortunately I have no corroborating witnesses to that revelation, but I’ll take it as a compliment with the stipulation that I was not the source of the story, only the pen meant to write it.

Belief defines existence.
Work and trial define life.
Life defines the soul.

Soldier on,

Ranse Parker